Outsourced

I was thinking the other day of all my loan debt, and how stupid and shortsighted it is for a first world country not to have higher education better subsidized, so that in order to get a graduate level degree, one doesn't have to sacrifice years of creature comforts while in school and then--if the degree-seeker is lucky to get a job at all without having to omit on her application the degree that overqualifies her--be committed to decades of staggering loan installments equivalent to everyone else's 300K monthly mortgage payments.

Meanwhile, people like Britney Spears make millions of dollars in a mere two years by wiggling around half naked on stage lip synching forgettable canned pop rock and retire at age twenty five to live up to their true potential of barefoot-and-pregnant. Except they get to gestate in Club Med resorts as opposed to their white-trash counterparts, who waddle around WalMarts giving themselves PIH and gestational diabetes with their non-Academy of American Certified Nurse Midwives prescribed diet of twinkies and McDonald's fries.

Any way, as a country, I think we've shot ourselves in the foot. Now we're even outsourcing tele-customer service jobs to India, so when I call a bank in New York, my call gets rerouted to New Delhi, and I end up talking to Deepak Singh who insists his name is really Harold Goodtree and asks me repeatedly how my your day is ("It was better before they started routing customer service calls to third world countries") when he can't seem to find the right troubleshooting prompt in his English for Customer Service Banking manual.

Pretty soon I'll be told they don't need American nurses any more, because they've found Bosnian refugees can teleport themselves into the hospital and will do the job for a dollar a day, and who cares if patients will never see a real person during their hospital stay.

For the record, I'm not knocking foreign labor as such. The people who answer the bank's phones are doing a job that most Americans are probably too lazy or proud or undereducated to do (how many white Americans know how to speak Hindi and English?)

I'm just saying the cheap Nazi corporate bastards that run this country are driving it into the ground, and if they don't watch out, pretty soon we'll be the ones sewing soccerballs for five cents a day and shipping them to places like India so that Deepak's grandson can practice for the day he grows up and goes to a British university on football scholarship, as per Bend It Like Beckham II.