Late Night

One night, I was sitting up, flipping through the channels, annoyed that I'd already seen the line-up for "court tv," when I noticed Fatal Attraction was playing.

You can almost guarantee that if it's late at night, some channel on some network, somewhere, is playing Fatal Attraction. Maybe it's dubbed in Spanish, but it's still Fatal Attraction.

Or some channel's playing that one movie with Jennifer Tilly, who schemes with that other woman to frame her gangster husband for stealing money, which they actually steal and go away with, all Thelma and Louise style? I don't know what the movie is called, but I've seen the last 30 minutes of that movie at least half a dozen times on late-night t.v., with the bad words all bleeped out. And every time I see it, it drives me crazy, because I always catch it from the exact same point in the movie, and I never catch what the flippin' name of the movie is.

So I'm flipping between Fatal Attraction and some weird, vaguely pornographic tele-a-thon thing I can't figure out called Pants Off Dance Off, when I suddenly realized that there's some larger, more universal applications to the archetypes in Fatal Attraction (which is also why it is a bad idea to do philosophy in undegrad, because you will end up deconstructing your kid's secret decoder ring messages if given the chance).

Then I realized: Oh no. I'm the kid with the white rabbit. The character that gets completely screwed because of every one else's whims, passions and power plays. The character that gets the PTSD and years of counseling because some crazy lady boiled her rabbit and then ended up dead in the family tub.

The victim, in other words.

I didn't really like the analogy in the end, but I couldn't deny the analysis: it all fits.

I mean, dude, I do have a white rabbit.