First, we went to the bank, so I could withdraw some cash. We walked along Second Street, which was kind of dumpy and the kind of street you wouldn't want to be on past twilight, probably. However, some guy sitting on the stoop outside Ture's Diner motioned to pet Piper, and I felt like a good citizen, because I had done my one altruistic deed for the day.
For breakfast, I went into Piroshky Piroshky, where the savory Piroshkies of all sorts tempted, but in the end, the Rhubarb Pirkoshky won out.
GIRL #1 IN PIROSHKY LINE:
Oh my God! Look at the dog!
PIPER:
[stands there, does nothing.]
GIRL #2:
Oh, cute, a dog!
PIPER:
[stands there, does nothing.]
[Jamie pays for piroshky and exits shop]
GIRL #1
Oh look, they're going now!
PIPER:
[walks two feet to the left]
GIRL #2:
Goodbye, doggie!
JAMIE:
[thinks to self: What am I, chopped liver?]
Oh my God! Look at the dog!
PIPER:
[stands there, does nothing.]
GIRL #2:
Oh, cute, a dog!
PIPER:
[stands there, does nothing.]
[Jamie pays for piroshky and exits shop]
GIRL #1
Oh look, they're going now!
PIPER:
[walks two feet to the left]
GIRL #2:
Goodbye, doggie!
JAMIE:
[thinks to self: What am I, chopped liver?]
Okay, so maybe I wouldn't have been so miffed, but we had just been about fifty feet from Piroshky, Piroshky, when a woman crossing the street immediately dropped her flowers on the trunk of her car and crooned, 'Oh! I just have to pet your dog!"
And at the vegetable stand, he got more props and a carrot which he otherwise would have turned his nose up, but stood there, holding the carrot in his mouth ever just-so, as if waiting for a photographic opportunity.
It was practically a Piper paparazzi in there:
It was practically a Piper paparazzi in there:
OLDER VEGETABLE STAND GUY:
Lookit, Sarah! The dog's got a carrot in his mouth!
[to Piper]
Do you like the carrot? Do you? Are you a good boy? Are you! Lookit you!
PIPER:
[wags tail, looks impressed with self.]
VEGETABLE STAND STONER GUY:
[to Jamie]
So, your dog's name is Pipe?
JAMIE:
Uh, no. It's Piper.
STONER GUY:
Oh man, that's like so weird. Did you ever see that one kid's show, with all the music on there? Like, they had some real cool musicians on there, like [names bands I can't remember] and LL Cool J.
JAMIE:
[thinks, "LL Cool J?", then tries to assume an air of polite interest]
STONER GUY:
Any way, like, there was this one puppet thing on there, and his word was like, "Pipe." Like, he'd just say it all the time. "Pipe." "Pipe" was like, his word.
JAMIE:
[thinks, "As in, I-totally-made-this-up Bong Pipe?]
[says outloud:]
Oh, that's, errr.... very nice.
CARROT:
[now on the floor, having been discarded by the dog, who looks vaguely bored like he's Lindsay Lohan, "Okay, this party is totally lame. When can we go to LL Cool J's afterparty?"]
Lookit, Sarah! The dog's got a carrot in his mouth!
[to Piper]
Do you like the carrot? Do you? Are you a good boy? Are you! Lookit you!
PIPER:
[wags tail, looks impressed with self.]
VEGETABLE STAND STONER GUY:
[to Jamie]
So, your dog's name is Pipe?
JAMIE:
Uh, no. It's Piper.
STONER GUY:
Oh man, that's like so weird. Did you ever see that one kid's show, with all the music on there? Like, they had some real cool musicians on there, like [names bands I can't remember] and LL Cool J.
JAMIE:
[thinks, "LL Cool J?", then tries to assume an air of polite interest]
STONER GUY:
Any way, like, there was this one puppet thing on there, and his word was like, "Pipe." Like, he'd just say it all the time. "Pipe." "Pipe" was like, his word.
JAMIE:
[thinks, "As in, I-totally-made-this-up Bong Pipe?]
[says outloud:]
Oh, that's, errr.... very nice.
CARROT:
[now on the floor, having been discarded by the dog, who looks vaguely bored like he's Lindsay Lohan, "Okay, this party is totally lame. When can we go to LL Cool J's afterparty?"]
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